How often do you think that you have been referred to as “shy” by somebody? Many people who go through their lives feeling uncomfortable in social situations can get like this. Typically, being called out for being shy isn’t going to make you come out of your shell, is it? It’s only going to make you go further back in. this is a typical trait of social awkwardness, and once it starts it can be a train that’s going to take a fair bit to stop before you crash off the tracks and into a depression.
One of the easiest ways to ruin your mood, your self-confidence and even your work performance is by being poor in social situations. Worst of all, for most of us it’s not something that we even choose to be like – one small event in your life can be the trigger that leaves you feeling like this for many years to come until you actually confront the problem. Fighting back against social awkwardness is the only way to stop being seen as an introvert by others and to improve your own self-esteem.
In situations where you feel embarrassed or shy, you need to work quite hard to challenge these thoughts & fears and avoid yourself from going back into your shell. No matter how hard it might seem to go on for twenty seconds longer when asked about your job or your night so far, just do it! It’s so much easier once you get started and the words will just flow, the thing that stops most people talking is the fear itself.
Try and get little challenges set up in your day-to-day living. Try and set yourself little basic challenges like;
- I’ll speak to 10 people every day in work for a minimum of 30 seconds, moving up as the days go by and you feel more comfortable
- I’ll make sure that my answers to questions are longer than 10 words, helping you get more expressive as time goes by
- I will try and break the ice with a new client with a little joke
- I’ll work on my eye contact with people and my facial expressions
These things above that you could work on are typical problems for somebody with social awkwardness. By working on these, you will usually find that the awkward symptoms of sweating, trembling, clammy palms or even difficulty breathing all start to pass quite quickly. Social awkwardness can be a brutal thing to live with, but setting yourself small incremental goals that you can look back on and use as a baseline for your development as a person can be hugely beneficial.
Most of our social problems are brought on by fear and the worry about situations that are the least likely to actually occur. When you start to deal with basic social interactions in a clearer, more concise manner you’ll notice just how easy it becomes to deal with any situation moving forward.
